Dec
10

Good day one and all. Let me introduce myself. My name is Shiela Stewart and I write paranormal romance. I am also a mother of three children, 14, 17 and 21 and have been married to an absolutely wonderful man for twenty-four years. I have accomplished a great deal in the three years since I was first published, having 15 books under my belt.  Now, personally, I think that is quite an accomplishment, considering I work in pain eighty percent of the time.

When I was twenty-five, I was diagnosed with Migraines. For those that don’t know what that is, let me give you a brief explanation.  Despite what you may have heard, Migraines are not just a headache and anyone who has ever suffered with them will tell you hearing people refer to them as “just a headache” pisses us off.

The term “migraine” refers to a syndrome of vascular spasms of the cranial blood vessels. Symptoms of a migraine attack may include heightened sensitivity to light and sound, nausea, auras (loss of vision in one eye or tunnel vision), difficulty of speech and intense pain predominating on one side of the head. It’s not pain you’re likely to forget if you’ve ever experienced it. The excruciating pain of a migraine, often accompanied by nausea or sensitivity to light and sound, can be brutally painful. As anyone who’s suffered a migraine can tell you, these headaches, when left untreated or treated ineffectively, can disrupt every aspect of a person’s life, from the ability to work to day-to-day activities and relationships. They can eventually lead to a loss of self-confidence, sense of control and self-esteem.

Though the description above does give you a good look at a migraine, it does not give you a complete idea of what it really is like to suffer from migraines so let me fill you in. Have you ever drank a cold drink so fast that it feels as if your head will explode? I’m sure you have. Now imagine while in that excruciating pain, someone is stabbing an ice pick into one of your eyes. Now, add extreme nausea and the need to stay away from the bright lights that are so painful to your eyes that you would just as soon rip them out then deal with the pain. Okay, visual enough for you. Now try dealing with that pain for a day, two, three, a week, two weeks. And while you are in that searing pain, try concentrating on writing a book.

That is my life. I suffer from a migraine at least three times a month and they always last for at least three days but have gone on for a week. If I’m lucky they only last three days, but rarely I am. But despite the pain, I have managed to write over fifty stories and published fifteen. There have been times my head has hurt so bad that I want to slam it into a wall. I’ve had thoughts of gouging my eye out to relieve the pain. And though I want nothing more than to crawl into a deep dark pit, I know I have edits to do and stories to get finished to meet my deadlines. It’s difficult to think over the pain, to focus on building a relationship where the hero and heroine just can’t get enough of each other while the pain is screaming in my head. But I manage because it’s part of my life and I have to get it done.

I rarely discuss the pain I am in almost constantly. Only once have I written it into one of my stories. But I find ways to deal with it, such as writing stories about vampires who live in a city cast in total darkness for an entire year. When I am in excruciating pain and the sun is shining brightly into my room, I often think how wonderful it would be to live in a world with no sun. I guess, in some sense, I am a vampire because I avoid the daylight. If I’m in a dark room and someone opens a curtain, I will cry out and scramble for any part of the room that is still dark. I don’t have the blood-lust, though if someone were to tell me drinking blood was my only prevention from these awful migraines, I wouldn’t hesitate.

So when I write about vampires, I don’t make them ruthless blood thirsty animals. Well, the evil ones I do but the hero and heroines are always just trying to live with their disease and find ways to cope with it. I am a child of darkness at least seventy percent of the time and so what would be more fitting than for me to write about darkness and the creatures who suffer in it.

Now, I didn’t write this to gain pity. If I wanted pity I would be more vocal about my pain. No, I wrote this to let you know why it is I write what I write. And also, to give hope to someone else who is suffering a much as I am and to know that despite the pain, there can be pleasure. You just have to find a way around it, like I have. As I write this, I am in the midst of a two day migraine and despite the meds I have taken, the pain is still killing me. Though it has taken me the better part of an hour to write just over nine-hundred and fifty words, I have managed to get this post finished. Why, you might ask? Because I am an author and just because the pain is blurring my vision and dulling my brain, I know I have a job to do and it must get done.

For a more in-depth look at my struggle with Migraines, you can go to my website at http://www.shielasbooks.ca/Migraines.htm

My website: www.shielasbooks.ca
Place to purchase my books: www.breathlesspress.com

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14 Responses
  1. RKCharron says:

    Hi Shiela :)
    Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt post. I am a migraine sufferer as well. I get all the symptoms. I’ve had to go to the hospital a few times. You are an inspiration to me. I completely understand the gouging out the eye to relieve the pain thought. Mine is a drill to the forehead thought. I am in awe of your stamina and perseverance. I will strive to follow your example.
    Happy Holidays,
    RKCharron

    • Shiela says:

      Hi RK, great to see you here!

      I’m so glad I could inspire you. It is really tough to work when you’re head is screaming in pain and I admit there are times it does beat me down. But I bounce back with a vengence. :)

      Yeah, I’ve been to the hospital so many times I’ve lost track. I usually wait for days, trying to deal with the pain myself but when I can’t and it gets to be too much I give in and go to the ER. Luckily, I’m usually given a room right away and they dim the lights. If I had to sit in the waiting area among the lights and sound I don’t think I would ever go in.

      I hope you have a great holiday and a pain free one at that.

  2. My oldest girl, JadeyKiss, suffers from them too. I get them every now and then, but I used to have them regularly when I was younger. Why I seemed to “grow” out of them is beyond me, but thank God I don’t get ‘em often anymore.

    • Shiela says:

      Hi Faith. Thanks so much for popping in. :)

      How old is your oldest? It sucks that anyone has to deal with these damn things. My oldest son used to get them when he was younger but he seems to have grown out of his as well and I thank god every day for that. Mine seem to be getting worse with age. It doesn’t help that florescent lights are a trigger. Those darn things are everywhere.

  3. Jaime Samms says:

    You’re an inspiration, Sheila. I don’t get migrains, but I do have two little headaches…Just kidding. What you describe makes me glad my kids are the only thing I have to worry about, and it gives me determination to do my job a little better, because if you can, surely I can find the reserves to get it done. Thank you for sharing your struggles and your good advice.

    Jaime

    • Shiela says:

      Hi Jamie,

      I have three big headaches…well four if you count my husband being a kid 90%of the time. LOL My kids are all above the teen years and one is driving and in the Military. That alone gives me plenty of headaches. LOL

      When i’m in pain and think there is no way I can go on, I think about all those people out there with disabilites that still manage to live a normal life and they inspire me to keep going. I’m glad I can do the same for others.

  4. Margie says:

    Sorry that you suffer from migraines. I am glad that you are able to still create such wonderful stories and do so much. Here’s hoping for a pain free holiday season

    • Shiela says:

      Hi Margie, thanks for stopping by.

      It amazes me sometimes to see all the stories I’ve created and I know that there are even more pushing their way to the surface. Someone once said to me that maybe my creativity is the reason my brain hurts. All those stories trying to break free. If that’s the case, i wish they woudl find a different way to get me to write. :)

      I’m hoping the holidays are pain free as well.

  5. Tess says:

    Awww,Shiela, my heart goes out to you. But by the same token, I so love your ability to work through that pain and live your dream of writing. Kudos to you. I’ll send up a special prayer to the angels to give you some relief. We need more stories from you. Pain free stories.

    Hugs,
    Tess

    • Shiela says:

      Hi Tess!

      Thank you so much for the prayer. I sure could use some relief. :)

      Right now I happen to be working on a story about Angels, so maybe they’ll be even more kind to me. :)

  6. Michael Bingamon says:

    Shiela,
    I had no idea that you suffered from such a condition. I cannot imagine attempting to focus on a story with that level of discomfort. My mother used to get migrains and it would all but shut her down when they came on strong enough. So while I’ve never had one, I’ve seen first hand what they can do to a person.
    The impressive part is you write aspects of your migrain experience into your stories. Using the sensitivity to daylight to help relate the undead existence of vampires into something a person can comprehend. Relating to a character, even a vampire, makes them more human.
    I find myself inspired by your example.

    • Shiela says:

      Aw Michael, thank you so much.
      I am so sorry your mom had to suffer with migaines and sorry you had to be witness to the pain. I hate that my children see me in pain, crying ina dark room because I just can’t stand the pain.

  7. Bless you – I know about chronic pain myself. Searing pain as opposed to a dull ache that never goes away doesn’t seem like much of a comparison, but either can drive you around the corner and over the edge. My sympathies, as well as admiration. I suffered terrible migraines as a teen, but for some reason, after my first child was born at 25, they went away. It took a long time before I realized. I always felt like I was walking around with my head ducked as if I was about to be hit. One day I realized that I hadn’t had one for awhile. When I started looking back, it had been over a year. Sometime during my 3rd trimester, they’d stopped. That baby is now in her 30s and they haven’t come back. I wish the same for you – not a baby – but a miracle. Mine was a bundle of love. May yours be a bundle of relief.

    • Shiela says:

      Hi kayelle, great to see you here.

      Pain, in any form is nothing to laugh at. Sorry you have to deal with it.

      I started getting migraines after a car accident when i was 14. In my teens I would get them about three times a year. Unfortunately, the older I get the worse they get. I had them through all three of my pregnancies. Who knows, if I knew having a baby would cure me, hell yeah, I’d have another one….maybe. LOL

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