Got your attention, didn’t I? Honestly, I am probably the last person who should be spewing advice on mental stability or on writing for that matter, but since it is my turn to blog I thought I would put down a few things I have learned and a few more I wish I would. The following is just my opinion. I cannot speak for anyone else. Please do not take offense by my opinions; it is just my way of making sense of a sad situation.
I have met quite a few very interesting people on AWH and I can tell you they are survivors. Most have been victims of horrendous acts and not only survived but have turned that act into a sort of creative goldmine to make villain more vile, heroes more life like and vulnerable. They make written rage feel real, feel palatable. They weave sorrow in blanket and wrap it around you until you feel it is a part of you. Draw you into relationship, fill you with love and in a few chapters leave you eviscerated when that love is torn away. Create characters that seem more real than the people we interact with on a daily basis and leave us wondering how.
How is this possible? How can the see so deep, write so well, what makes them so talented? I think that those of us that have been through abusive situations have in a way been given a special gift. Most of us who went through sexual abuse have learned to retreat into a world in which we actually have some control. A world in which you know good from evil, right from wrong and Mommies and Daddies never hurt or leave you. You observe people so you can “act normal” and so we naturally pick up quirk and unique traits that make a character more real. I personally have a desire for strong kickass female leads that aren’t taken for granted and don’t put up with anyone’s crap.
In the art world depression runs rampant. So my question has always been is it art that depresses us artist or are the depressed naturally drawn to the creative aspects of art? I think it is the latter. Personally, I find the control I have in creating worlds, characters and situations very soothing. It is quite therapeutic to create a character that resembles my abuser only to kill him off in some horrific way, usually eaten by animals which then regurgitate him since he is so vile.
I have learned through my few short months at AWH that you must have support in place. People, who will guide you without blowing sunshine and rainbows when you suck, but point you in the right direction with kind and informative suggestions. You must have people who will tell you the truth. Ones that will pick you up when you fall, make you laugh when you want to cry and pat you on the back when you write: The End.
Oh and the thing I am still trying hard to learn…That not every compliment comes with a catch. It isn’t a set up to make you fall harder and that sometimes the best friends you have in life are only reached in cyber space. Avoid Writer’s Hell is one of the best places to receive not only support and guidance, but you will find some of the best friends you will ever meet. I have never been in a more thoughtful and caring group and I thank God that I was pointed in their direction and they took me in. I truly feel as though I am standing on the shoulders of giants when I stand among these talented women and men, but it is what helps me keep my eyes on the horizon. I am truly grateful and honored to call you all my friends!
Marguerite LaFayette
